A Mirror of Life: Dealing with Rejection in Grant Writing

Rejection. It is a universal experience and an inevitable part of life. Not every relationship will work out, not every job application will lead to an offer for the position that you believed was made JUST FOR YOU; and likewise, not every grant proposal will be funded. For those of us who have ventured into grant writing, rejection is a familiar emotion. Each denial feels like a setback - that gut punch, a reminder that all the hard work and hope poured into a that relationship, or that job application or even that grant proposal wasn’t enough. Here’s the truth: rejection, whether in grant writing or in life, is not a verdict on our worth or abilities. Instead, it’s an opportunity to grow, to refine our behavior or approach, and to build resilience. So, it shouldn’t be surprising, some of the strategies we use to cope with life’s rejections are often the same ones that can help us navigate the murky waters of grant writing.

Acceptance.

When things don’t go as planned, we’re often left to pick up the pieces. Bewildered, broken hearted, and hurt, we must learn to try again. It’s easy to take rejection personally. We are our own worse inner critic. We tend to focus on what is it we’re lacking. We might think that we’re not good enough, smart enough, or talented enough. It’s hard sometimes not to take rejection personally, no matter the circumstances. Yet there are countless factors beyond our control. It’s not a reflection of our value. Rejection is part life. No one avoids the pain.

And just as life throws curveballs for reasons beyond our control, grant proposals are often

turned down due to factors beyond our influence—limited funding, strategic shifts, or the

volume of competition. In this work, you learn the competition is fierce, many worthy projects vying for limited funds. For instance, for my last federal grant review over 3,000 applications were submitted, with no more than 14 applications funded. Which means thousands of applicants experienced rejection. By accepting that rejection is not only possible, depending on circumstances even probable, we can approach both grant writing and life with a healthier mindset - a growing step. My Aunt Lela says, “Honey, life’s a journey, it is NOT a destination.”

When we learn we grow.

Rejection, painful as it may be, is a most powerful teacher. That pain can teach you.

Rejection in life often comes with lessons—if we’re willing to look for them. Whether it’s a

failed relationship teaching us about our own needs, past traumas, vulnerabilities, and coping skills, or a missed job opportunity pushing us toward an even better career fit, there’s always something to be gained. Every rejection offers an opportunity to learn about ourselves. Grant writing is no different. A rejected proposal is an opportunity. Reviewers’ feedback, when provided, can be a goldmine of insight, highlighting areas for improvement. By treating rejection as a learning experience, we can grow emotionally and mentally stronger, preparing us for future challenges, whether in our personal lives or in our grant-seeking.

Seek Support.

We often turn to our friends, family, or mentors for support in times of rejection. Their

encouragement, whether by a phone call, text, or card, or bringing your favorite snack to

indulge in, helps us regain our footing and see things more clearly. The same is true in grant

writing. Seeking support from colleagues, mentors, or your professional network can valuable. They can provide guidance, share their own experiences with rejection, and offer advice. Surround yourself with a supportive community – hopefully it’s an intergenerational village! Whether in life, or in grant writing, we were never meant to walk this journey alone.

Keeping it in perspective.

One of the most important lessons in dealing with rejection, both in life and in grant

writing, is the importance of perseverance. Rejection, no matter how painful or even life-

changing you feel, isn’t the end. A setback can feel overwhelming, completely overriding our

achievements and progress. It is a detour – a shift. And a reminder: there are some things you CANNOT control. In grant writing, a rejection letter doesn’t negate the value of your project or the effort you’ve invested. Whether in life or grant writing, every rejection is just one chapter—what matters is how we continue the story.

In grant writing, each rejection is one step closer to an acceptance. Continue to refine your

approach. Learn from each experience. Keep pushing forward and fill your knowledge bank -

you’ll eventually find success. Avoid getting bogged down by negativity.

Moving Forward.

Dealing with rejection in grant writing is much like handling rejection in life. Both require

resilience, a willingness to learn, and the determination to keep going despite setbacks. By

applying these strategies to both your grant writing and your personal life, you’ll not only

increase your chances of success but also develop the inner strength that comes from

overcoming adversity. Rejection may be inevitable, but with the right mindset, it can also be a powerful catalyst for personal growth. Here’s Big Mama’s Playbook for grant opportunities!

Weekly wisdom in their own words:

“There is great value in dreams and plans but sometimes it’s the mystery that takes us where

we need to go.”

-Jamie Ridler (in her 50’s)